On psychology and jealousy of gaijin living in Japan, thinking about Japanese grammar while in the bath, and using the Far Side in English class

I've written before about the psychology of ex-pats living in Japan, such as the the Three Stages of Eye Aversion we foreigners seem to go through when encountering other gaijin on the train the first few times, or our distaste for foreigners who do something rude then take the polite silence of the Japanese around them as a sign that it's okay to keep doing it. Then there's that odd built-in resentment of other gaijin who have been here longer than us and/or who speak Japanese better than we can, which I learned about when I came here after studying the language at SDSU for four years. This confused the Americans, Canadians and Brits I hung out with, since most of them started studying after arriving here, and they weren't sure how to categorize me. Foreigners living in Japan can be especially jealous of the annointed "gaijin talents" who get to to be on TV just because they can be funny and/or insightful while speaking Japanese. A good example is the Egyptian fortune-teller Fifi-san, who has gotten quite a following of fans with her appearances on variety shows lately. For a wedding present my father gave me the autobiography of Donald Keene, an American translator who came to Japan soon after World War II ended and got to hob-knob with all the great Japanese writers of the postwar period, from Yasunari Kawabata to Dazai Osamu to Yukio Mishima -- lucky bastard. As a general rule, any given foreigner will tend to be mistrustful of the theories put forth by other gaijin (hence, whenever someone disagrees with me I can defend myself based on this principle).

When you go to an onsen (OWN-sen), a public hot springs bath, it's important to have all the essentials with you, and in my car I keep a basket with all my bath-related stuff in it -- toothbrush, razor, large rubber bands that let me keep the shower nozzle from shutting off every 10 seconds, and a notepad for writing down all the ideas for J-List posts that come to me while soaking. I recently bought new toothbrushes, changing my normal one from blue to purple, which prompted my son to comment on my "Mace Windufication," after the Jedi Master in the Star Wars films who uses a purple lightsaber. When I started learning Japanese, I wondered how some of the linguistic concepts we use all the time in English would be represented. Japanese is based on kanji for its higher vocabulary functions in much the same way that English is based on Latin and Greek, and complex ideas like "capitalism" or "carbon dioxide" can be rendered in kanji quite logically (資本主義 and 二酸化炭素 in case you were curious). One useful character is bakeru (化ける, to change, to transform), which is read ka in its Chinese form, and this character corresponds to the concept of "-ification" or "-ization" (i.e., a change from one state to another). Some examples of words that make use of this character are kyouka (強化、KYO-ka, strong + change) meaning "strengthen"; oubeika (欧米化, oh-BEI-ka, Europe + America + change), essentially meaning "Westernization"; and the big problem in Japan these days, shoushika (少子化、sho-SHE-ka, few + child + change), or the declining number of children throughout the country. So when my son noted the change in my toothbrush color, the word he used was "Mace Windu-ka." Can you guess how you'd say "otaku-ification" in Japanese? Before I got into the business of writing about Japan to people all over the world I taught ESL, and I had rather a decent horde of teaching materials accumulated, from workbooks for teaching elementary school age kids to dozens of textbooks and also a game called "English Baseball" where students were asked questions in English and would make a "hit" if they were able to answer correctly. One pre-lesson activity I liked to do was bring my favorite Far Side comics into class and start a discussion around them. As you might imagine, the jokes I thought was hilarious -- "Shocking the anthropological world, a second 'Lucy' is discovered in Olduvai Gorge" (it's Lucy Van Pelt), or "Great moments in evolution" (a bunch of fish have just hit their baseball up onto land and must now evolve legs if they want their ball back) received puzzled looks from my students. Clearly, what Japanese (or Germans, or Koreans) find funny won't necessarily be viewed the same way by Americans, and I suspect Japanese would be more amused by character-based humor that blends unexpected situations for that character. The one Far Side joke that always got a laugh with my Japanese students was "Cat Showers" (a cat in a shower with a giant tongue licking his body). Remember that J-List carries authentic Japanese "loose socks" in two different sizes, and also carries "socks glue" which you can use to glue your socks to your legs to hold them up. Enjoy a little slice of Japanese fashion culture courtesy of J-List -- they also go great with the authentic high school uniforms we sell, too! Great for cosplay at anime cons or as normal socks that help keep you warm in the cooler months. Here are today's "really cool products" that I thought were especially noteworthy. Note: the J-List links below may be for adult products and should probably be considered "not safe for work" (a yes/no verification screen will be displayed to filter products from our mature site). To see all the J-List products, check out J-List or the JBOX.com updated products link. We also recommend watching our "new products" RSS feed

	Karami 17 -- Asuka Sawaguchi. Asuka Sawaguchi looks great in her Karami photo magazine, a whole magazine dedicated to one lovely actress, with no ads.
	egg July 2007 vol. 129. Egg magazine lets you follow the fashion world of young people from wherever you happen to live.
	Voluptuous Fairy - Youen -- Nana Toriike. Fabulous photobook featuring the lovely Nana Toriike.
	Mask Musume. The Japanese love to wear those masks that keep your germs off other people, and here's a photobook of nothing but!
	My Only Super Body Doll -- Rio Hamazaki. Some day guys will be able to buy dolls like this. Some day...
	Japanese "Lucky Panda" Solar Powered Relaxation Toy. Lucky Panda wants to bring your home good luck, through the power of the sun!
	Anime "Initiation Paddle" - YAOI. We now carry the famous "Anime Initiation Paddles" from Hen da Ne. This is the "Yaoi" one...
	Anime "Initiation Paddle" - YURI. ...and this says "Yuri." Yaoi are themes of male/male romantic love in anime, manga and game, and Yuri is the girl/girl version of same.
	Mononofu Shinsen-Gumi Swords Collection vol.2 ~ Complete Set (Set of 7, Includes Rare Item). Excellent line of samurai swords from the Mononofu people. These are the actual swords used by the famous Shinsengumi samurai!
	Shoxx vol. 173 July 2007. Shoxx is the "Visual and Hard Shock Magazine" and we've got a single issue in for you, if you're not sure if you want to go for a subscription yet.
	Multi Mini TATAMI Mat. Display anything you like on this great tatami mat-themed stand. Great for displaying on object of beauty, or maybe your favorite Star Wars vehicle.
	Louise 1/8 Figure ~ Zero no Tsukaima (The Familiar of Zero) by Charaani *Preorder*. Really cute character from a show that I am not familiar with. Hope to change that fact though.
	Ceramic Lucky Gold Fish Netsuke with Bell. Lucky Gold Fish strap, this is really cool-looking
	Easy Training Chopsticks. Learn to use chopsticks with these -- what a great idea!
	Kazuki Arisaka 1/8 Figure Swimming Suit ver. ~ Tona-Gura! Super cute anime figure of a girl adjusting her swimsuit.
	Poke-Pachi Pokemon Shapeshifting Fizzle Candy -- Cola. Pokemon candy that turns into taffy-like stuff before your eyes.
	Walkie Bits -- Green *Melon*. These are little electronic frogs that Takara has made for you. They walk, race, dance and more! Restocked!